Wizards and Aliens
by GoldenFairy
Summary: The Doctor, Amy and Rory find themselves as eleven-year-old, enrolled at Hogwarts.
1. A Master Plan and a Magic Cat

Magic and Aliens

A Master Plan and a Magic Cat

The Doctor pulled and pushed the controls with the ease of a man with hundreds of years' experience. He told his companions what to do as they piloted with him. The, of course could not reach his dizzyingly high standards of TARDIS flying. When Rory asked what their destination was, the Doctor told them they were on their way Mexico.

"Please don't come back with a sombrero!" exclaimed Amy, thinking about the collection of hats she had tripped over. The TARDIS was enormous but the Doctor could still leave a hat box somewhere anyone can easily trip over.

"Why not? I like sombreros." the Doctor said as the married couple rolled their eyes. The Doctor said (and Amy mouthed), "sombreros are coo-"

The TARDIS jolted erratically – well, more than usual – the crew were thrown forwards and backwards and forwards again and back. The question, 'what is going on?' appeared in each of their heads. Though, strange things often happened to the three, even stranger than their usual adventures.

The TARDIS landed suddenly. They were all somewhat bruised and battered from being propelled around the entire TARDIS console room. The TARDIS doors opened and a man entered. It was a man who the Doctor knew so very well. The Master.

"You've regenerated!" he cried accusingly. He then pulled out his laser screwdriver and shot each of them.

Rory woke up, confused. Not only did he feel disorientated but also... short?

"Wha..." wait, was that him? It sounded too high-pitched. He decided to focus on his surroundings, instead. They were in the living room of a a nice but modest flat. The TARDIS was parked in a corner, making even less space. A man was standing by the TARDIS, he recognised him from somewhere.

"Master, what have you done?" asked a boy who looked suspiciously like the Doctor. Oh no, this wasn't good, they were all children, he recognised ten (maybe eleven or twelve)-year-old Amy. "I thought, after everything we've been though, you'd changed." If he hadn't just been de-aged by a blonde version of a former Prime Minister, he would have laughed at the incredibly dramatic way the Doctor had been talking.

"That's what they all say!" Amy said.

"I'm giving you a treat, you get to go to–" The man began to say.

"Who are you?"

"I am the Master," he said the most over the top evil sounding voice he had ever heard. "Hasn't the Doctor told you anything about me? I'm in arch-nemesis!" 'The Master' told them in response to their blank faces, though they were more confused than ever. He looked out of the window, "Oh, here they are." He opened the window and pulled in an owl. He untied four letters from it's feet and threw three of them to the Doctor, Amy and Rory. Addressed to Amy Pond, Rory Williams and John Smith. They looked at their letters which all said they had been accepted to a wizard school.

"Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry?" Amy asked.

"It's in Scotland." the Doctor replied knowingly, as though he didn't think the existence of a magical school. "You'll feel right at home."

"Seriously? Wizards and witches and magic?" Rory said disbelieving.

"Oh, look we get hats!" the Doctor exclaimed.

"And wands, proper magical wands!" Amy was apparently unconcerned too.

"We are not going to this probably non-existent school!" Rory said. He was putting his foot down – literally. "We've just been kidnapped by a potential megalomaniac, de-aged (if that's even a word) and forced to go to school!"

"Hogwarts does exist, doesn't it Doctor?" Amy asked and the Doctor nodded. Before Rory could protest she continued, "come on, time travel, aliens, robots – is magic such a stretch? Also as a potential megalomaniac, he's hardly going to give us a choice, is he? So we may as well enjoy it." When Rory thought about it, he imagined that learning magic would probably be a lot of fun and as he'd managed to accept aliens, why not magic?

"How did they know we were here?" he inquired.

"Magic," the Master responded with a smile.

After fifteen minutes of silence in which they each contemplated the situation, Amy asked, "What year is it?"

"Er, 1989," the Master said muttering about 'getting it wrong'.

As they were walking through Diagon Alley, shopping for Hogwarts supplies, Amy and Rory looked at everything in awe while the Doctor took it as an opportunity to talk to the Master.

"How did you escape the Time War?"

"I managed to contact you, past you and I convinced you to free me. You wouldn't remember, I made you forget."

"You make it sound so simple."

"Does it need to be complicated?" the Master questioned.

"You like elaborate plans." he then changed the subject, "How do we have magic? Why are you doing this anyway?"

"Oh, it's been a while since I escaped and I've been doing experiments, trying to harness wizarding power. And like I said, it's a treat."

The Doctor frowned at the latter statement, choosing to only respond to the former, "so, you can 'take' magic, if you're not born with it. What are you doing if you're not going to be a student?"

"I'm teaching you Astronomy! Apparently the previous teacher won the Wizarding Lottery." Both of them laughed.

Rory flicked through his new books and inspected his recently bought potions equipment, " I hope these things are going to make more sense when we get their and actually use them."

"What's my cat telling you?" asked Amy. She had bought a black cat, she had said if she was going to be a witch she would include a cat, a broomstick and start cackling madly, to feel the part. The cackling had frightened the Doctor and Rory.

"She's admiring my bow tie." the Doctor said. "She considers herself to be her own cat and not your property, by the way."

"What should I call her, I can't keep calling her 'the cat'."

"Her mother named her Cecilia."


	2. The Sorting

The Doctor, Amy and Rory were on the Hogwarts Express, sitting in a compartment with three fellow first years. They were told much about the wizarding world, well as much as you can tell someone on the journey from Kings Cross to Hogwarts. The Doctor found talking to the eleven-year-olds as if he were their age much easier than Rory and Amy did.

"You sure about that bow tie, Doctor?" asked Amy.

"Doctor? Isn't that what muggles call healers?" asked Lee, one of their new friends.

"Er, yes," Amy asked, thinking of a reasonable excuse for calling a child 'doctor'. "It's his nickname because he, er-" She looked at Rory and the Doctor for help.

"I saved a man's life, with a stethoscope and a bit of string," the Doctor said. It was actually a true story, though the string was 51st Century nano-string and he wasn't even sure if it was a man who's life he saved.

Rory and Amy were probably more shocked than they should have been. They'd seen and done some really unusual things. Rory had been plastic and waited for a box with Amy inside, in comparison going to magic school, in a magic castle with a magic ceiling should have been nothing.

A singing hat? The hat Professor McGonagall, the stern Deputy Head placed on a stool had burst into song. A rational part of Rory's brain told him that he should have really expected such things at a magic school.

The sorting began. Apparently, the hat could not only sing but also decide what house each student could be in based on personal traits.

"Pond, Amy," said Professor McGonagall. Amy walked to the front, sat on the stool and put on the hat.

"Gryffindor!" cried the hat. Amy went to table on the far table where everyone who sat there applauded.

A few people later it was the Doctor's turn, McGonagall said, "Smith, John."

This time the hat took a little longer than usual to decide. Most people were sorted in seconds while it took minutes for the Doctor. At one point the Doctor muttered, "thank you, that's a very kind of you."

"Ravenclaw!" the hat eventually shouted.

The Doctor nearly went the Hufflepuff table before being pointed in the right direction and stumbled toward the Ravenclaw table seemingly unaware that the previously applauding students and staff were now quiet.

As Rory's own sorting neared he was beginning to get a bit nervous. What if the hat revealed him to be sly or if he were placed in the house for "all the rest." After Fred and George Weasley being sorted into Gryffindor it was Rory's turn.

"Hmm..." said the hat. "I know exactly where to put you... Hufflepuff!"

Oh, that was the one for "all the rest," wasn't it? Though the hat had said something about kindness and loyalty too so it wasn't so bad.

"I would like to introduce the new Astronomy teacher, Professor Saxon," Professor Dumbledore announced. The Master stood up and everyone politely applauded. "And the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher, Professor Padmore."

The Doctor thought there was something slightly odd about her, her eyes were a bit too bright and her hair looked like it wanted to jump off her head. There were various things which made her look far from the average human being. She was outrageously tall and her body was disproportioned.

"She's not human," the Doctor announced to his fellow Ravenclaws. Some of them gave him odd looks while others ignored him altogether. "You know, she looks like someone who has a rough idea of what a human looks like and made a disguise from that." More strange looks went his way. He'd have to watch her.

"Are you our long lost cousin?" One of the red-haired twins asked Amy.

"Or sister," added the other.

"Maybe we were triplets, separated at birth."

"'Weasley' ring any bells?"

"What?" asked Amy, bemused.

"Everyone in our family has red hair," explained and older boy Amy could only assume was their brother. "I'm Charlie Weasley. That's Fred and George," he said, pointing to the twins. "But don't ask me which is which."

Meanwhile at the Hufflepuff table student were speculating how the current defence teacher would leave. Some of the first years didn't understand this.

"It's not very nice, suggesting a teacher will mysteriously disappear in the forbidden forest, is it?" said a Cedric Diggory.

"Well that did happen to one of them..." muttered a seventh year.

"I thought Hufflepuff was the kind house," Rory wondered aloud.

"Yeah, well, Slytherin is synonymous with evil but that doesn't mean all of 'em are evil, does it?" asked a purple-haired girl.

"Yes, it does," replied the seventh year.

"My mum was in Slytherin, not calling her evil, are you?" she asked with a smile and the older student looked a little sheepish. "I'm Tonks and the Defence Against the Dark Arts teachers only ever last a year, apparently, the position's cursed."

The Hufflepuff's took bets on the circumstance of Professor Padmore's eventual departure. The oddly specific guesses included: resignation due to stress, sacking and alien abduction.

A week later Albus Dumbledore was sitting in his office with Professors Saxon and McGonagall standing opposite.

"Minerva has received a complaint about your teaching, Harold," Dumbledore said, calmly. "I have assured her she has nothing to worry about but I thought it would be good if she heard what you have to say."

"What was it about?" asked the Master. He hoped it had nothing to do with Marcus Flint, he had merely suggested that banging his head against a wall would improve his intellect. There may have also been some mind control involved.

"You've been teaching the students utter nonsense!" cried McGonagall. "Beings on other planets? Universes we don't even know about? Why would you want to fill the children's brains with such things?" She pulled out a pile of parchment and put it on Dumbledore's desk. "Notes on the Master's lessons written by the student who made the complaint. He spoke to other students about their lessons and compiled notes about them."

"I'm teaching the first years the basics!" the Master protested.

"Minerva, I know you mean well," began Dumbledore. "But there is nothing wrong about what he's teaching. Though I admit, I don't know enough about other universes to know for sure if there is anything wrong with it." He held up his hand before McGonagall could add anything. "I have regular correspondence with five people from other universes and have met many more."

"Is any of this actually astronomy?" asked McGonagall

"As you know, I'm known for allowing my staff to teach mostly what they wish, within reason." Dumbledore said. "Also I imagine Professor Saxon's curriculum is more interesting for the students."


End file.
